Shout out to Small Hospitals

I’m a small-time doc in a small town and I work at a small hospital in the Midwest, and I’m proud of it. The huge university hospitals (like Cleveland Clinic) get all the glory (especially in society and in the press), but it is small hospitals like mine that drive this country.

Been really weird working at a small hospital, where it seems like the emotions are more magnified than in the big city. A year ago, it seems like every day there was a local community group bringing food or bringing treats for the hospital workers. Nationally, there was this outcry to recognize those in the medical field. 

And, then, something changed. Now, for some reason, both nationally and locally, medical workers are seen as “the problem,” and there is a lot of negative emotion directed as us. And, it seems locally, it seems like that negative emotion is magnified. Why did that happen and how did we get here?

As I wrote previously, despite all the headaches of what I do, I still love my job. But, I definitely understand and I empathize with those who have left the medical field altogether. We have our own unique labor shortage and labor crisis. Paraphrasing from the restaurant industry, “Everyone is short staffed. Be kind to those who show up for work.”

So, shout out to all those in the medical industry working in small towns and in small hospitals. I see you out there, and we see you out there. I know you are hurting physically and emotionally these days. Stay strong, ask for help if you need it, and stay safe. Thanks for reading this, and I hope that you are having a good day....

Happy New Year?

Yes, it’s the new year, but I’m not ok. You’re not ok. I’m glad that we are given permission to say this now, especially in the medical community. I’ve been conditioned (by my profession and by society expectations) to just keep going. 

I talked about the day after Christmas holiday weekend in a previous post. The day following the New Year’s weekend in a doctor’s office during the pandemic was the same thing. Once the office turned the phones on,  there was a shockingly deafening sound of all the phone lines ringing at once, quite scary, I have to say. It was call after call, after call, after call. People who felt ill. People who where possibly exposed to COVID. People who were definitely exposed to COVID. Those who tested at home. Those who could not find a home test - anywhere.

Then, people came to see me. “I heard home testing was not accurate,” someone said. “I need a PCR test for my employer,” another person said. “What do you mean you ran out of in-office tests?” The amount of concern, emotion, and anger out there, is still palpable, and I hope my personal protective equipment helps me deflect the emotion out there in addition to the physical ailments out there.

And, that was Monday. Happy New Year. Thanks for reading this, and I hope you’re having a good week....

(fyi, in case you were wondering, our office were only out of testing supplies for a short period of time. We’re back up and running and COVID testing in-office again)

Found My Why

I know people get on social medial to complain and to bash this person or that person. Other people use social media to sometimes vent (see my post yesterday). But, today, I wanted to say that even though I’m dealing with COVID and with a lot of other things in medicine, I still LOVE my job and I’m honored with people’s trust in me with their health.

Last week, from one of my pediatric patients, I received the cute Christmas gift pictured. Some people don’t know that Family Doctors see kids as patients, in addition to their parents, and their families. I was having an extraordinarily tough day last week, and this gift arrived along with a touching Christmas card.

And, at that moment, my day seemed to freeze. I was thrown back to my days of medical school when I would dream about taking care of kids and families, and occasionally receiving a pleasant surprise. And, for the rest of my day, I had this cheesy  grin on my face, and my office staff was probably thinking I finally lost my mind.

One of the phrases I’m seeing on social media these days, especially with the New Year around the corner, is “Find Your Why.” I’m lucky and fortunate enough to have found my why, and that is being a Family Medicine Physician, to take care of my patients and my community. And, even with all the headaches of my job, and the controversies associated with COVID and other topics, I still believe that I have found my calling, and I hope that you have “Found Your Why” as well. Thanks for reading this, and I hope you’re having a great day.....

Never Been Like This

At a family medicine office, the week between Christmas and New Years, is usually pretty relaxed. Usually during this week, I’m doing things like tidying up my office, and doing some office cleaning that I have been neglecting for the past 51 weeks.

However, we are now in the age of COVID. And this week has been unlike any other week in my professional life, and I’ve been in practice more than 20 years. Our office is fortunate in that we have access to COVID test kits (at least for now), and as soon as our office turned on our phones Monday morning, the phone lines did light up like the Christmas tree that we have in our waiting room. And, we are seeing more patients now, then during our busiest time of the year.

Don’t get me wrong, the positive test results that are happening are not just in “the unvaccinated.” We are seeing positive tests in those “triple vaccinated,” as well. So, yes, there is a chance that you’ll get COVID, even if you’re vaccinated. However, in the cases that I have seen, those who have been vaccinated, are just not as sick. Of course, that is my own anecdotal story, and strictly speaking not “scientific evidence.”

Something that all of us can agree on is that we are tired of this pandemic. We may have different opinions on how we got here, and how to get out of the pandemic. But, if you do seek medical attention for whatever ails you, please keep in mind that those who work in medical offices (and hospitals and anyone in the medical field) are people too are we want to help you, and we want to vent about this pandemic just like you. All I ask is that you pack some patience and understanding when you go to the doctor’s office, especially during this holiday time. Thank you for reading this, and hope you are having a good week....

Grieving Christmas: One Year Later

It’s hard to believe that is has been more than a year since my dad passed away. The grieving process is such a unique and interesting thing. Since I have been so public in sharing my process, it has been so helpful for all those (friends and strangers) who have reached out to me - whether they have been grieving for 1 month or 50 years.

“The Year of Firsts” is a real thing, in that the first birthday with them gone, the first Christmas, the first holidays, etc. It’s totally emotional, and totally not logical. It just kind of hits you without you knowing it. There were times when I remembered the exact same day one year earlier - recalling back minute by minute.

But now, it’s the second Christmas without dad. Everyone has told me that it doesn’t get better, it just gets different, every year. It’s not that the pain is any less. For me, it’s just that the positive memories are a little stronger this year than last year. Will that continue? Who knows? Grief is a strange thing. Thank you for reading this, and I wish you and your family a Merry Christmas.....

First COVID Vaccine Dose: Reflecting One Year Later

Christmas Eve 2020: One Year Ago

Hard to believe that it has been a year since I received my first COVID vaccine dose. I was trying to remember back to what the world was back then and what I was thinking. I was so, so, so scared of getting COVID infection, because I saw those patients every day in the hospital, and as a physician, I knew the real story of what was happening to these patients, and not what the media was saying.

I was so concerned about potentially bringing COVID home to my family, and would they be infected? When I received the call that there would be a vaccine dose available for me, a sense of relief went through by system. And, when I finally received that first dose, I felt my first sense of hope that I have felt for the past year. 

By taking care of these COVID patients in the hospital, I knew how much these patients (and families) were suffering, just with my day to day work, and it was right then that I told myself that I would try to prevent this from happening to anyone else. And, that’s one thing that drives my passion for COVID vaccination.

Yes, there is too much politics associated with COVID vaccination. And, yes, the medical establishment has done a poor job of communicating to the American public. This post is not to continue the blame game.

I respect people’s right to choose to get the vaccine or not to get the vaccine. It is my job to try to talk to my patients and to talk to my community, to try to address their questions and their concerns. There is no quick way through this, and if it takes me talking to one person at a time about the COVID vaccine, then I’ll do it.

I wish you peace this Christmas Eve. I also wish you health and happiness. I appreciate you reading this, and I hope that we can work together to get through this pandemic....

Omicron Variant Detected in Ohio

The Ohio Department of Health reported yesterday that The Ohio State University laboratory confirmed the first two cases of the COVID Omicron Variant in central Ohio. The two cases were detected in two adult males who tested positive via PCR test on December 7, 2021. These individuals were found to have mild symptoms and are not hospitalized. (WCMH)

Even with the current Delta variant, I have received questions about how to detect Delta variant, Omicron variant, or other variant? Can the tests out now detect which variant it is? Can you know today if you have a COVID variant?

So, what happens is that variants are detected via PCR testing that is usually done by hospitals. However, these positive PCR tests are then sent to larger regional hospitals, like Cleveland Clinic or Ohio State University hospitals, and further testing is done at those facilities. What happens is that these special laboratories perform sequencing and this is where they figure out if it is Omicron. (BBC)

So, the rapid tests that you do a home, or the the rapid tests that are done through offices like ours, these tests do not have the capability to determine whether the COVID infection is Omicron or Delta variant, or other. What we can assume is that we know that Omicron is probably round this community and other communities.

However, the plan is the same. First, do NOT panic. To help prevent Omicron and COVID infections, please get vaccinated for COVID infection, and if you’re up for a COVID booster shot, please get that done. Are the vaccines out now going to work for Omicron? It’s still too early to say. Stay tuned.

Also, if you are not sure if there are vaccinated people where you are going, consider wearing a mask indoors. And finally, continue with your hand washing, hand sanitizer, and social distancing. We’re all in this together!

Brain Cancer Awareness: My Story

May is Brain Cancer Awareness Month. Our local television station, WKBN in Youngstown, Ohio, contacted me to share the story of my father and my story during this month to raise awareness for brain cancer. I’ve learned a lot about this tragic disease, and I have learned a lot about myself in the process.

The TV interview was recently broadcast, and it was a well done three minute report. What I want to share with you here is the rest of the story, and the behind the scenes interview in which I really open up in a way that I never have publicly, and probably never will again.

What you’ll see in this article is the video of most of the 15 minute interview that WKBN reporter Jacob Thompson did at my office, which is the Family Practice Center of Salem. His opening questions were about me describing my father and him enjoying being the life of the party, and enjoying activities like karaoke.

In the middle and end of this video, he really started digging deeper into what was happening to my dad during the course of his symptoms, his diagnosis, and the family’s decision to have dad at home at the end, with hospice, to let nature take its course. The questions became more personal, which caused me to dig deeper into my emotions, to places where I haven’t been in a few months. I knew at anytime, I could have paused the interview, or stopped the interview altogether. But, I challenged myself to journey onward to those intense emotions, where I haven’t been in months.

I was asked to describe that final day and night of my dad’s life, which I really haven’t shared publicly, until now. This was very painful to re-live, but in a way, I felt ok telling the story, getting it out there, and to no longer have it within me. The last thing I share in this video is the guilt that I still occasionally feel about being a son and being a physician, and still not able to help my father to survive this cancer. You’ll see me really trying to hold it together for the last 2 minutes of this video as the emotions surge inside of me.

Also during this interview, I share how I have been dealing with grieving process, and I shared that being transparent, and utilizing social media, this is one way that I have been trying to process my emotions, and trying to share with all of you where I am at with things. I’ll probably never do a public interview like this again. But, I wanted to share it with all of you as a snapshot where I’m at. If I can help one of you out there by sharing this, then I’m glad that I helped someone today….

Bereavement During The Holidays

It has been a little more than a month since the passing of my father. And, I knew that Christmas time was going to be tough, and here we are. As I write this, it is Christmas Eve, and the photo above was taken one year ago, on our last Christmas together as a family.

As I have said before, I do not pretend to have all the answers when it comes to the grieving process, I guess I’m utilizing this blog as my was as self-expression, a way to check in with all of you, and to share my process.

For us as a family, Christmas Eve was really the holiday for us. Our family traditions are solid. Back in the day, we went to Midnight Mass, but as the years have gone on, we ended up going to an afternoon or evening service. Our family would always opt for opening gifts on Christmas Eve, as opposed to Christmas Day. And, in the recent past, I’ve taken to recording video to remember these nights. I was going to post some Christmas Eve videos, but it was just too emotionally difficult to do that tonight. Maybe next Christmas.

They say that holidays are tough following the passing of a loved one, and the first holidays, birthdays, and other events, are especially challenging. I guess for this Christmas, it has not really hit me until right now. And, while I feel tremendously sad, I know that I have all these Christmas Eve memories that I can call on to bring that smile to my face, to still remember the good times. Miss you Dad….

Thoughts Before COVID Vaccine

Later today, I’ll be receiving my first dose of the COVID Vaccine. Since I see COVID patients every day in my office and in the hospital, I’ve been designated in category 1A by the CDC. My office also has been working with our local hospital (Salem Regional Medical Center) and with our local health departments, and I’m very thankful for that.

Last night, I recorded the video above sharing some thoughts and observations prior to receiving my first dose of COVID Vaccine. I’ve been seeing some trends on social media and in the conversations that I’ve been having with patients, over the past week when first seeing health care workers posting their vaccine selfies

First off, I’ve heard from a lot of patients about their hesitancy on getting the COVID Vaccine. And, please believe me when I say that I do get it, and I do understand the hesitancy. Like many other people in the health care community, we have been talking about this vaccine for months. However, I understand that most people in the general public may not have been following the development, testing, and distribution, as much as I have.

However, I also talk to many of my patients about an outright fear of the vaccine, and this paralyzes them, and this really prevents them from considering receiving this important vaccine. In my discussions with patients, I encourage them to talk to me about it, and I encourage people to talk to their Family Physician about their concerns. In addition, I encourage people to check out reputable websites to get more information. In this video, I mention a website from my professional organization the American Academy of Family Physicians.

Finally, I caution the general public not to misinterpret enthusiasm and excitement for the COVID Vaccine, to translate into bullying the general public into getting the vaccine. I definitely understand many people’s points of view of vaccine hesitancy. However, I also ask that population to understand the point of view of many health care workers, in what we have seen during the COVID-19 pandemic, namely the illness, the sickness, and death associated with COVID-19. And, for many health care workers, including myself, this vaccine represents a shot of hope to get us through and out of this pandemic. I hope you’re able to check out my video above. Happy Holidays!